Spender vs. Saver = Know your couple goals

My role as a Financial Planner can be very varied, and it depends on which client you speak to as to how I am described.  I have one client who describes me as her financial conscious, which seems flattering until she describes me as this annoying little voice in the back of her head disputing the need for a prospective purchase.  I have other clients who want me to track their financial position, some who give me a specific goal to help them meet, and those who have retired and just really want a cup of tea and a chat.  I can't think of a client that I don't like (I usually send those ones to Naomi), but some couples need a little more of a helping hand than others.  To these couples, I range from a referee to a financial crisis manager.

Basically, these clients are not on the same page as their spouse financially, and it can end up a deal breaker.  For example, one may be a spender and the other a saver.  The spender is interested in funding their lifestyle, and the saver is worried about their future.  There are many reasons this happens, for example my ex-husband's Dad died very young, and so he tends to live in the moment with his spending habits.  Another reason may be that the saver doesn't want to end up in the same financial position as their parents, or that there was a lack of financial education while the spender was growing up.  The "She'll be right" attitude gone wrong. 

Having this conversation is hardly romantic, but you will save yourself a lot of pain if you have it before you cohabitate.  The goal is to know where each of you stand as an individual, before joint finances become an issue.  From these individual goals you can form an idea of what your couple goals are, and whether they are acceptable to each individual.  The key is to effectively communicate why the individual goals are important, so that they can be assessed at a couple level and you both have the opportunity to articulate what it brings to the relationship. 
 

Not having this conversation and understanding of your partner can bring conflict when the relationship encounters stressors.  A stressor may be having children, loss of employment or even having to pass over an opportunity due to a lack of, or hoarding of, resources.  If both individual spouses have their own agenda, it is difficult to get full commitment to the goals of the couple.
 

Some moderation on your individual view of finances may be needed, and some couples never get there, and continue to have separate financial lives.  Other couples work hard to come to a middle ground over time.  Neither option is right or wrong; use what works for you as a couple. That way, you can get back to nagging each other about the important things in life...like who left the toilet seat up again.

By Erin Wright B.Int Bus Dip. FS(FP), Accredited Aged Care Specialist
Find Erin at Achieveit Financial Planning or call for an appointment on 07 4638 5011